Out of time

Delusions in my peripheral 
whisper rumors in my ear
depressions way of saying
" I am back.
Hey doll
won't you let me take a crack
at ya?"
I am driving fast down this highway
well past legality
drunk off crazy and fucked up on mind
because happiness is fickle
life can be hell
and this is how I have spent most of mine
fending off depression
playing head games with myself and
I know I'm losing time
before it runs me down 
before the sun sets
and stays
dark
sad
void
numb
days
and 
long
nights
Will I have the strength
the next time?
this time?
to win again?
I do not know
and so, here I am
driving fast down this highway
trying to get away
using all the strength of all my days
to defend against demons
that get in the way
of my pursuance of a happy life
demons that try to convince me
I'm out of time