Out of time

Delusions in my peripheral 
whisper rumors in my ear
depressions way of saying
" I am back.
Hey doll
won't you let me take a crack
at ya?"
I am driving fast down this highway
well past legality
drunk off crazy and fucked up on mind
because happiness is fickle
life can be hell
and this is how I have spent most of mine
fending off depression
playing head games with myself and
I know I'm losing time
before it runs me down 
before the sun sets
and stays
dark
sad
void
numb
days
and 
long
nights
Will I have the strength
the next time?
this time?
to win again?
I do not know
and so, here I am
driving fast down this highway
trying to get away
using all the strength of all my days
to defend against demons
that get in the way
of my pursuance of a happy life
demons that try to convince me
I'm out of time

Mean Bitch

I use to love mean bitches
mistaking their crude and flippant nature
as the strength of their kind
as they talked shit
straight from the horses mouth
"in your face"
- disgrace-
Woman, please
act with a little grace
and stop reacting
to every little thing
that "so and so" says
it's not strength
your showing off
by running your mouth half cocked
it's weakness
of character
Weakness of spirit and soul
the only strength you've built
is in that jawbone
and- you- are- work-ing- that
aren't you honey?
and i bet my money
your working him also
yeah, you see,
I use to a be a mean bitch too
but it wasn't sexy on me
and it isn't sexy on you.

~ M. Sneed

Expiration Date

You sit opposite
the man behind the desk
- he is short-
- so is the desk-
you sit opposite him
in his white lab coat
you sit across and you wait
for him to pull a number
- and you wait-
like a rabbit from a hat
like the lucky powerball
- you wait-
- for the expiration date-
years of sad
- gone-
- and you wait-
years of happy 
- gone-
- and you wait -
holding your breath
between heart beats
- you wait-
- for the expiration date-
all through your life
- you wait-
all through years and symptoms
accusations and assumptions
-you wait-
you ponder having magnets made
to give away
- you wait-
to friends and family
the ones that say-
" save the date"
- and you wait-
and they should finish with
" today is the day"
and you fill in the blank
- with your expiration date-
or maybe
count down the days until
like Christmas
- and wait-
shoot off fireworks 
at your wake
- you wait-
til the man in the white lab coat
assigns you an expiration date
- and then again- you begin- to wait-




~ M. Sneed

we are Magic

We are all

STARdust

a COSMIC CREATION

complex

and

FANTASTIC

we are

MAGIC!

We are all

MESSAGES

of TRUTH

between the EARTH,

the MOON,

the UNIVERSE too

simple

yet GALACTIC

we are make believe

we are momentary

we are MAGIC!

 on my mat

i fill the SPACE

between BREATHS

between holding on

and letting go

RELEASE and STAY

CONNECTED, BOLD

dramatic

We are ESSENCE

We are SPIRIT

We are 

MAGIC!

In my HEART

i SING

my SOUL is HAPPY

 in this LIFE

I have known

MIRACLES,

PEACE,

and LOVE, 

oh, sometimes so tragic

but as always

we are, 

as it is,

eternally,

soulfully,

undeniably

 MAGIC!

~ M.Sneed

Brain Fuck

I suffocate beneath the pressure of my own neurosis

you are a brain fuck

and you make me feel

so very crazy

When i met you I was not in a jealous way

You are a brain fuck

and you make me act

so very crazy, 
baby

but baby you were the brain fuck

I was needing

pulling me from my safe space
to head case

secretly revealing

from beneath those dirty sheets

that I 

....was all yours

I don’t like the way you whisper, lean in towards her

you are a brain fuck

and you make me speak

so very crazy

I don’t like the way your hand is dancing up her spine

you are a brain fuck

and make me dream

so very crazy

I don’t like the way your dimples shine through your smile

the way, for her

you always give another mile

you make me scream

out loud my crazy, 

baby

with no means left to claim

since you left me

You are a brain fuck

but baby you were the brain fuck

I always needed

pulled me from my safe space
to head case

secretly revealed

from beneath those dirty sheets

that I 

....was all yours

just when I think it is over and done

you are a brain fuck

you make me tingle

from my own crazy

tumble again, I do, with ease
you are a brain fuck
you make me release
all around you
my crazy,
jealousy,
fuck me, insane
crazy I am
every time you come round again
you are a brain fuck

but baby you are the brain fuck

I was always needing

pulling me from my safe space
to head case

secretly revealing

from beneath these dirty sheets

that I 

....am all yours

~ M. Sneed